GhostKing Screws up Time and Space!
by Lordoftheghostking28
Summary: Don't worry, I won't do it again... :  T for random humor. If you want to laugh, go here!
1. Author Laws and other crap

**Welcome to the CrackFic of DOOOOOM! *Insert Invader Zim laugh here* **

** If you want to laugh, this is the place. Read on, incredibly brave, loyal, and awesome readers…**

** Chapter One,(Most of) The Author Laws and other important Stuffs…**

** XxXxXxXx**

GhostKing was writing a FanFiction about her writing a FanFiction. By doing that, she created some sort of supernatural never-ending paradox and had to delete what she had written previously to avoid breaking the Author Laws of Time and Space*.

*( The Author Laws of Time and Space is just one volume in a set of twenty three. The Author Laws keep the authors from randomly killing off characters that aren't theirs and magically bringing them back to life in the next chapter (Unless it's a CrackFic), randomly bringing unnatural things to life, ect. Now The Author laws of Time and Space _clearly_ state that no never-ending paradoxes shall be opened in the first three chapters of any FanFiction. It just confuses people. Here is an actual excerpt from The Author Laws of Time and Space…)

_ Thou shall not open thee never-ending paradoxes in thee firsteth three chapters. They confuse thee loyal readers._

_ …_There it is in black and white. Do not open never-ending paradoxes…

_ Unless thee paradox is in thee CrackFic of Doom_.

…Oh, an exception. OH BOY!

GhostKing deleted what she had written anyway. Just in case this FanFic wasn't qualified as a CrackFic. She then proceeded to write stuff. The stuff she wrote did not involve paradoxes…yet. Her writing involved action, adventure, peril, humor…ect. The stuff she normally writes about. The stuff that makes anyone insane laugh.

EXCERPT FROM GHOSTKING'S WRITING:

_ Because I'm not allowed to write paradoxes yet, this is what's going to happen now. But I can tell you know that the later chapters will contain many frustrating paradoxes that might make people crazy. Oh well. That's just the way I am. Anyway, because I can bend the Author Laws very slightly because I'm a few steps above a Brainstormer*, I can open portals anytime I like. And right now I'm bored, so I'll open a random portal._

_ (_*Brainstormer: Someone who's not quite an author, but not quite just someone who just sits and reads FanFiction all day. They usually come up with astounding FanFic ideas, but don't know just how to write them down.)

A random, purple and blue portal opened next to GhostKing's computer. Goku from Dragon Ball Z fell out.

"Aw, crap, what am I doing here?" He wondered.

"Ha, sorry." GhostKing said. "But now you're part of my FanFiction. I opened a random portal and you fell out."

"I'll stay if you can give me a Dragon Ball," Goku said.

"A Dragon's _what_?" GhostKing nearly screamed.

(**INTERRUPTION!** In The Author Laws of Magical Objects, which is book three in the series of twenty three, clearly states that Authors can't make objects of any power appear randomly. They either have to find whatever it is themselves, or find a Brainstormer to come up with a cool story on how to find whatever.)

Goku turned a bright shade of red. "Never mind." He muttered.

"Here, go back to your planet." GhostKing opened another portal and Goku jumped through headfirst, only to land on that one creepy lizard guy that GhostKing can't remember the name of. We'll call him LizardFace…

"AAAGH! What the heck?" LizardFace screamed.

GhostKing quickly closed the portal when fireballs began flying everywhere.

She sighed and opened another random portal.

Edward from Fullmetal Alchemist fell through and landed on his robot arm, breaking it in half.

"Aw, crap! Winry's gonna kill me!" He yelled. The he caught sight of GhostKing.

"IT'S _YOU_!"

"Yep, me." GhostKing said. "Welcome to FanFiction world. Don't worry, I'm not an obsessive fangirl."

Then Spock from _Star Trek_ walked by. GhostKing just kinda stared and squeaked, "Take me with you! This planet is full of morons!"

Edward rolled his eyes. "You're an Author, aren't you? Fix my arm, I command you! Or I'll turn you into a toad!"

(**INTERUPTION:** The Author Laws of Alchemy clearly state that everything has an equivalent exchange. If you cook an egg with Alchemy, you must put in an equal amount of energy or something to make your power…whatever…thing. Edward can explain it better…)

GhostKing pressed her hands together and the Alchemy symbol on the back of her left hand (That was shaped like a Tri-Force) glowed a cool blue. A vase in the corner of the room disappeared. Edward's arm was restored to all it's robotic glory.

"I'll be going now." He said, acting all important.

GhostKing opened another portal and he went away to Alchemy World, or whatever.

Spock came back. "Alchemy is illogical." He said at last.

"This CrackFic is illogical," GhostKing sighed. "No one wants to stay and talk." She cast a hopeful glance at Spock.

His communicator beeped. "We're ready to beam up." Captain James T. Kirk's voice said.

"Maybe another time." Spock said before he was beamed up to the _Enterprise_ to go explore strange new worlds; to seek out new life and new civilization and to boldly go where no man has gone before. *Random heroic music begins playing*

So now GhostKing was left alone. She read a bit of the Author Laws before continuing to write.

Excerpt from: The Author Laws of Edible Substances…(Which is book two in twenty three)

_ Thou shall not make thee characters eat crap._

'Nuff said.

GhostKing tried one more time to open a portal to a world where someone would actually stay and talk to her for a while. A red portal opened up, dumping a load of fish on the floor and another Author.

This Author was GhostKing's friend, annabethchase98. But she preferred to be called Sarah.

"What the heck?" Sarah demanded, picking an anchovy out of her red hair.

"I should be asking you that. What were you doing with that much fish?" GhostKing facepalmed.

"I was designing my own world." Sarah growled. "And I was going to put some fish in the oceans."

GhostKing took a look at the fish around the room. They were all dead.

"These fish are dead." She observed.

"That's because they died going through the portal." Sarah huffed. "They can't breathe in Time and Space, you know."

"Sorry. Go back and design your world and then come back, ok?" GhostKing opened the portal again and Sarah jumped through after throwing all of her twenty thousand minnows through. It took the good half of an hour.

Finally GhostKing was alone again. She crossed her fingers and opened another portal, hoping for _someone_ sane…

The portal opened behind her for some reason and Silver the Hedgehog collided with her chair, knocking her out and onto the floor.

"Where am I?" Silver asked after a moment of awkward silence.

"My lair of awesomeness AKA the computer room." GhostKing got up. "Wanna stay and eat popcorn and watch movies or something?"

"OH YEAH WOOT!" Silver cheered.

(**INTERUPTION** from The Author Laws of Out-Of-Characterness, book five in the twenty three book set:

_ Thou FanFiction characters may be out of Character, but not so out of thee character that it is stupideth. Unless thee FanFiction is thee CrackFic of Doom.)_

So Silver and GhostKing popped popcorn and watched _Lord of the Rings_, the most epic movie of all time. They watched all 9 hours in two minuets somehow, because GhostKing is writing the CrackFic of Doom and she can bend Time and Space slightly more than if she was writing a real story.

"Epic," Silver concluded.

After that they played tag and practiced Alchemy. It was a good day.

Now while they were blowing up random things with their Alchemy/telekinesis stuffs, you might as well pass this time to read another excerpt from book ten which is the shortest book in the twenty three book series, The Author Laws of Yaoi:

_NO YAOI__** …EVER.**_

…'Nuff said. The book is only half a page long because it's written in font 100…

So rest assured, fans, that there will never be any Yaoi ever in GhostKing's FanFictions. She is not a perverted fangirl. If she likes someone, it's because they're an awesome character that resemble her in some way.

Anyway, back to Alchemy stuff…

GhostKing blew up a tree. Silver blew up a boulder. GhostKing blew up a trash can. Silver blew up Space.

But GhostKing quickly restored Space because FanFiction writers in different dimensions were getting annoyed.

"Sorry." Silver said, ashamed of himself.

"I think that's enough Alchemy for today." GhostKing decided. So they went back to her computer and tried to call up more portals.

They successfully brought Aang the Avatar to FanFiction world.

"I WANNA GO HOME!" Aang wailed, so GhostKing opened another portal, causing him to land somewhere in a freezing cold ocean and freeze that way for a hundred or so years. SO THAT'S HOW IT HAPPENED!

"Ooh, I know! Let's bring Blaze here!" Silver suggested.

So they brought Blaze there.

"How did I get here?" Blaze wondered.

"Long story. Want to blow things up?" Silver asked.

"Sure." Blaze said evilly.

"PYROMANIAC!" GhostKing shouted.

So they blew up Reality. Like it existed anyway in FanFic world.

**THIS CHAPTER IS NOW OVER BECAUSE GHOSTKING IS REALLY WANTING TO WRITE PARADOXES NOW**

But first, another excerpt from an Author book; book eleven out of twenty three:

The Author Laws of Laws:

_ Thou shall not make unfair laws to rule over thee characters that aren't yours. Thee are owned by someone other than you, like KONAMI or NINTENDO or SEGA or TOKOYOPOP. They own all rights to thee characters that thou are writingeth about. Beith fair._

__**XxXxXxXx**

** Tis a CrackFic. It's not suppost to make sense. This is for pure 'WTF' moments and laughs only.**

** No trolling, flames, ect. It's sad how I have to put that in everything now…**


	2. The Ultimate Sugar Rush

** CHAPTER 2, The Ultimate Sugar Rush**

** XxXxXxXx**

After blowing up Reality, the trio went back into GhostKing's house to call in others via portals.

"THE CAKE IS A LIE!" Someone screamed from a portal. GhostKing decided to close that one because the screamer scared everyone.

But their second portal was successful. Shadow flew out of it and hit GhostKing's chair, knocking her out and to the floor. Closely following him was Sonic, who ran both him and the Author over and then flattened himself on a wall. After Sonic came zooming into the room, Mephiles drifted out, laughing hysterically.

"GET BACK TO THE PORTAL! IT'S CLOSING!" Shadow jumped up and flattened Mephiles on his way to the portal. Who's laughing now?

Sadly, the portal closed…but not before it closed on Shadow's arm.

There was a long moment of 'OMG that is so freaking COOL' before GhostKing regained consciousness and found her glasses. She took one look at Shadow's armless side and laughed nearly as hysterically as Mephiles.

"It's not happening…this is a CrackFic…This is not happening…" Shadow muttered, slowly going pale.

(**INTERUPTION** from The Author Laws of The Fourth Wall excerpt, chapter 34, paragraph 5:

_ Thou FanFiction Characters shall not know what a CrackFic is. That is breaking the Fourth Wall, which can lead thee onto a terrible situation._

Keep that in mind as we continue on…)

"I'M A MONGOOSE!" Sonic shouted randomly. His face was still planted firmly in the wall.

"Hang on, Shadow! I'll consult the Author Laws of Healing to see what I can do." GhostKing whipped a book out of nowhere, breaking the Author Laws of Whipping Books out of Nowhere, which is section 54, chapter 6, paragraph 7.4 in The Author Laws of Objects. Don't confuse The Author Laws of Objects with The Author Laws of Magical Objects. There is a difference.

"Hmmm… ok, I'm to the section that will tell me what to do if Fictional characters get their arms chopped off in a portal…" GhostKing turned a few pages. "All I have to do is re-open the portal and your arm should fall out here."

Upon opening the portal, Shadow's arm fell out and landed on Silver's head, freaking him out and making him go into shock. Sonic grabbed it and got into an epic fencing position. "EN GUARD!" He shouted loudly.

Shadow's detached arm gave him the finger.

"Ok, now you've got his arm. How do you re-attach it?" Mephiles asked.

"Superglue?" Blaze suggested.

"… Duct tape….Duct tape…" Silver muttered in his shock.

"Or duct tape." Blaze said.

GhostKing looked in the book again. " 'Thou may only call upon their true power if a character is dying a painful death to ease their passing.'"

"Please just kill me. I can't stand being in yaoi or CrackFics anymore." Shadow begged.

"Oh, here we go." GhostKing said. "I have to throw you in a swirling vortex of time and it will somehow reattach your arm."

"Who wrote that book?" Shadow demanded, grabbing his arm from Sonic.

"The Author who created FanFiction." GhostKing said dramatically. "One of the three zillion holy beings in the universe, first being God. Ok, let's get this over with." She made a dark, evil swirling vortex of time appear.

"You are not throwing me into that." Shadow hissed.

"Sorry, it's what it says in the book."

GhostKing picked Shadow up by his foot and throw both him and his arm in the vortex. Loud screams were heard and a zombie popped up, but Mephiles smashed it down into the swirling death again. More screams. Most of them being screams of long ago tortured souls that have rotted in Hell for years—

(THE AUTHOR LAWS OF SWEARING CLEARLY STATE THAT ANY WORD MAY BE USED, AS LONG AS IT IS USED IN CONTEXT, OR AS A SYMBOL OF GREAT FUSTRATION. THE F-BOMB MAY NOT BE DROPPED MORE THAN THREE TIMES A CHAPTER, NO MATTER WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES.)

—and are now enjoying a nice feast of hedgehog.

Out from the portal popped Bugs Bunny.

"Hey, what's up, Doc?"

Quickly following him was Doctor Horrible, who jumped up and screamed, "NOT GOOD, YOU FLEA BITTEN BUNNY!" and he beat him back into the portal.

GhostKing, Blaze, Sonic, and Mephiles just sort of stood there, unsure of what to do. Silver sat on the ground, rocking back and fourth on his butt and sucking his thumb. He was still in shock, you know.

That was about when Rayman jumped up and blasted a Raving Rabbid in its face with a toilet plunger gun. The Rabbid freaked out and turned into a zombie, diving back into the vortex to help beat up Bugs. Rayman almost succeeded in escaping the vortex, but the Biolizard grabbed his foot and ate him.

More shouts, followed by the phrase, "COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE."

Out came that one lady from Resident Evil, who had guns.

"Why does this sh*t always happen to me?" She wondered before a Modern Warfare guy sniped her.

Then a Matrix opened.

"Oh, cool!" GhostKing cheered as the band Linkin Park came out and began singing Bleed it Out at the top of their lungs. Mephiles joined in.

"YEAH HERE WE GO FOR THE HUNDRETH TIME, HAND GRANADE PINS IN EVERY LINE, THROW EM UP AND LET SOMETHING SHINE, GOING OUT OF MY F-"

An explosion blew the roof off the house. Maybe it was caused by the hand grenade with the pulled pin…who knows?

After all that crap, the roof was somehow restored and Linkin Park was sucked back into the vortex. There was a flash of random colors, mostly consisting of oranges that made everyone squeeze their eyes shut, and then a sound like a frying pan being smashed over someone's head.

GhostKing opened her eyes to see a small blue Chao. It was sitting on the edge of the vortex, looking lost and really hungry. Silver, who just came out of shock, saw it and tried to pick it up.

"Aw, look, he's so cute…"

The Chao opened its unnaturally large mouth and took a chunk out of Silver's hand.

"OH MY GAAAAH! IT'S RABID! AAAGH, THE PAAAAIN!" Silver wailed, going back into shock.

The Chao fell backwards into the portal and a Pikachu ate it. Then Ash from Pokémon jumped out, screaming, "GOTTA CATCH EM ALL!" before throwing a Pokѐball at Sonic and actually catching him.

"OH YEAH!" Ash vanished with Sonic.

Then the vortex imploded and created a sort of black hole effect, sucking in all coffee and anything with a lot of sugar in a fifty mile radius. There was a blinding flash of light.

When everyone could see again, GhostKing realized that the vortex had spit something out. The large green dot in her vision faded and she was greatly relieved to see that Shadow's arm was re-attached. But the bad thing was he wasn't really moving.

"Aw, crap. I actually liked that guy." Blaze muttered, eyeing Silver, who was back to rocking back and fourth on his butt and sucking his thumb.

"Are there any Author Laws to surgery?" Mephiles asked evilly, brandishing a meat cleaver.

"Probably in the Author Laws to Healing." GhostKing sighed, picking up a nearby chainsaw. "But I don't wanna take the time to read it. Come on."

She struck an epic pose with the chainsaw and then stood over Shadow and lowered the blade towards his head.

(THIS SCENE CENSORED BECAUSE IT MAY MOVE THE RATING UP TO M)

** KNUCKLES**: Whoa, wait a second! This didn't happen!

** TAKAL**: If you really did cut him open like that, you'd lose a lot of fans.

**GHOSTKING**: haha, oops. I'm kidding, jeez. Don't take it seriously. Back to the story…rewinding a bit…

"Are there any Author Laws to surgery?" Mephiles asked evilly, brandishing a meat cleaver.

"Probably in the Author Laws to Healing." GhostKing sighed, picking up a nearby chainsaw. "But I don't wanna take the time to read it. Come on."

She struck an epic pose with the chainsaw and that was about when Shadow jumped up and sort of stared at her, his eyes slightly unfocused.

"Uh…Shadow?" GhostKing asked, revving the chainsaw.

Shadow's ear twitched and then he practically launched himself into the wall, making a large hole. There was a shout of, "HUZZAAA!" before another crash sounded and he was back in the room, standing next to two holes in the wall.

"Uh, Shadow, are you ok?" GhostKing asked, holding the chainsaw out in front of her, just in case.

"I'M GONNA FLY TO THE MOON NOW!" Shadow shouted, running into the wall and bouncing back onto a grand piano. After playing the intro to Moonlight and Madness by Trans-Siberian Orchestra at lightning speed, he jumped on the top of the piano and flew through the roof.

"What happened to him?" Blaze asked slowly.

"Well…the vortex did kinda suck in all coffee products and anything with an insane amount of sugar…" Mephiles said.

"Ooooh, crap."

An kumquat smacked Silver upside the head and he snapped out of shock. "What happened?"

"Shadow's on a sugar rush, GhostKing's a quack, and Sonic just got caught by some insane Pokémon trainer." Blaze explained.

** MEANWHILE IN POKEMON WORLD**…

A creepy looking fire dragon thing was trying to eat Sonic.

Ah, that's not important right now.

** Back with the other guys**…

"Oh my gah did he just set that pizza on fire?" Silver asked, staring out a window looking horrified.

"I wouldn't doubt it." Blaze sighed.

Then a random TV popped up in the middle of GhostKing's yard; the kind of TV that pops up everywhere in SA2 when you're Knuckles of Rouge. Then a Wii appeared and Guitar Hero. Shadow zoomed by, grabbed the guitar, and played Through the Fire and Flames on Expert, getting a 100%. But the Wii disagreed and screamed, "SONG FAILED, 100% ON EXPERT."

"Jeez, even when perfect isn't good enough…" Blaze sighed as the TV burst into flames.

Chaos Zero popped up from the ground and extinguished the TV, restoring it to normal. He played Through the Fire and Flames and failed three seconds in. "WIN." The TV protested.

Everyone turned their attention back to Shadow, who was sort of vibrating in place on account of sugar and caffeine. His left eye twitched a lot and then he found a banana the size of GhostKing's Algebra book.

"Dang, that's a big banana." Silver said, looking hungry.

"It doesn't exist!" Mephiles said.

"Yes, it does." GhostKing said back. "He's eating it."

Shadow ate the banana and ran around in circles.

Then Midna from Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess appeared. "I don't care, b*tches!" She said loudly.

"Where did she come from?" Blaze asked.

"I don't know, this is the CrackFic of Doom." Silver shrugged.

Then Black Doom appeared. "_EN GUARD, SWIFT STRIKE_!" he said evilly.

"AAAGH!" Everyone dived out of the way to avoid being hit by gigantic flaming comet things. GhostKing's house exploded.

That was about when Linkin Park showed up again, this time singing Wretches and Kings.

"STEEL UNLOAD, FINAL BLOW! WE, THE ANIMALS, TAKE CONTROL! HEAR US NOW! CLEAR UNTOLD; WRETCHES AND KINGS, WE COME FOR YOU!" And they launched into an epic guitar solo thing that made Through the Fire and Flames look lame.

"STUPID TOAD!" Midna screamed louder.

"_I got my eye on you_." Black Doom said evilly.

"Stalker!" Silver squeaked.

And then a Vortex of Space opened and they were both sucked into it. But somehow Silver, Blaze, Mephiles, GhostKing and the whole of Linkin Park were not effected.

But once the Vortex ate Doom and Midna, Bon Jovi jumped out and there was an epic battle of the bands.

"OOOAAA! WE'RE HALFWAY THERE! WWHHAAAOOAA! LIVEN' ON A PRAYER!" Bon Jovi sang epically.

"SO GIVE ME REASON! TO PROVE ME WRONG, TO WASH THIS MEMORY CLEAN! LET THE THOUGHTS CROSS, THE DISTANCE IN THE RISE! ACROSS THIS NEW DIVIDE!" Linkin Park countered.

GhostKing took off her sweater, revealing an epic emo rocker suit thing underneath, and sided with Linkin Park with their New Divide.

Bon Jovi looked rejected until Silver joined them and sang You Give Love a Bad Name epically.

GhostKing grabbed a guitar and played an epic solo.

Silver grabbed drumsticks and played an epic solo.

GhostKing's guitar shot a laser.

Silver caused an earthquake.

The neighborhood was demolished.

(…Crap, I liked it there…)

GhostKing played Eruption from Metallica epically. It made Mephiles cry from pure epicness.

Silver played a random solo he made up himself. It was also epic.

…But then Manic booted him out from behind the drums and took over.

"AW CRAP I AM NO MATCH FOR THE EPICNESS!" GhostKing wailed, taking the guitar and smashing it over Shadow's head as he ran by.

The smash sort of created a black hole effect, sucking in everything in a twenty mile radius, which would be the bands, the demolished neighborhood, and the carbon based life forms.

"HEY WE NEED SOMEONE ON KEYBOARD! ONE WILD NIGHT!" John Bon Jovi said.

GhostKing ran to the keyboard, abandoning Linkin Park. They got mad and went away.

"ONE WILD NIGHT!" Silver and Bon Jovi sang.

** ONE EPIC SONG LATER**…

Everyone was sitting around a campfire. Except the bands. They left to perform a gig somewhere. Oh, and Shadow. He was tied to a tree.

"I like marshmallows!" Silver said happily.

A fire spirit rose out of the fire and said a prophecy. "_Beware of sharp things_," It said.

"Um…ok." Blaze said, glancing around to make sure no one had anything sharp.

While no one was looking, Manic jumped in the flames and somehow got teleported to a random planet in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. "AAAAHHAAA IT BURNZZ!"

Everyone kinda sat there for a few seconds.

"_Beware sharp things_," The fire spirit said again. "_and that guy_."

"Sure thing." Mephiles said, looking creeped out. The Fire spirit melted away into the air, catching the air on fire. But then it died. No worries.

"OMG! OMG! I HEAR REVIEWERS GIVING US THE EVIL EYE!" Shadow shouted randomly.

"No, that's just Black Doom." Blaze said.

"_The reviewers want something besides this crap_." Doom said evilly. "_I'm just the messenger_."

"…How can you hear the evil eye?" Silver wondered.

"NO PARADOXES!" GhostKing screamed.

Everyone sat there for a long time. The only sound was the fire crackling.

"Shadow broke the fourth wall again." GhostKing muttered to herself. "Great."

"What was that?" Silver asked. "I don't see any walls."

"AUTHOR LAWS! PAY NO ATTENTION!"

There was a random explosion in the distance and Dark Gaia broke open the land, setting free Pokémon.

"AW, CRAP!" Everyone shouted.

** 5 MINUETS LATER**…

They all had hid in the tree Shadow was tied to, escaping the evil enraged Pokémon Wrath of Kahn. (_LOL STAR TREK 4-EVAH!_)

"That was kinda close." Everyone said.

"Hey, go away!" GhostKing said. "Who are you, anyway?"

"I'm Everyone." Everyone said. "I'm just some OC that everyone hates."

"Go away." Mephiles hissed.

Everyone went away.

"SWINE FLU!" Shadow shouted.

"Now what? We're stranded in a random planet." Blaze asked.

"Maybe we should do what that other guy did and jump in fire." Silver suggested.

"It looked like it hurt, though." GhostKing thought.

"If it means getting back home, then I'm ok with that."

** TROLOLOLOL**

** THIS SUCKS**


	3. No Paradoxes Yet!

**XxXxXxXx**

** CHAPTER 3, NO PARADOXES YET!**

Because FanFiction says no one to two lined FanFics may be submitted, I will now pass this chapter with these words of advice, one of which is in Spanish:

Cobra.

Un vaso de leche.

Abcderg

GOOMBA

La la la la la.

…I really want to skip this chapter so I can write paradoxes. Hey, it's a CrackFic. I can do ANYTHINGZ. :P


	4. Prof Gerald hijacks the Story

**XxXxXxXx**

** CHAPTER 4, Professor Gerald hijacks the story/GhostKing takes back control**

"…Wait…what? Oh crap…this thing is writing everything I say. . Um…Antidisestablishmentarianism. Jeez, this thing is good… Hey, what's this about Shadow on a sugar rush? What's Author Laws? Why am I asking this out loud so this thing can write down everything I say?… Why am I asking stupid questions?"

*POOF*

"Hey, who are you?"

"I'm GhostKing." GhostKing said. "Pleasure to meet you. How did you hack my story?"

"No clue, actually."

"That's what I thought. And I can sort of explain everything…sort of. Well, see, there was a vortex of time I had to throw Shadow in because he lost his arm in a portal and it gave him his arm back, but the vortex absorbed all coffee and sugar products within a really large radius, and now he's all hyper. Oh, and Sonic got captured by Ash Ketchum, Silver went into some sort of shock twice, we played in bands, and we demolished a few neighborhoods and are now on some sort of planet with aliens." GhostKing said really fast.

"?"

"I take it from your confused expression that you're as confused as I am." GhostKing sighed.

"How is all this possible?"

"I'm an Author. This is a CrackFic. 'Nuff said."

*POOF*

"OH MY GAH IT'S THAT ONE GUY!" Silver shouted really loudly.

GhostKing rolled her eyes. "I should be going now."

"Please do."

"Wait…before we do anything…" GhostKing paused for a few seconds. "Can we take Maria with us? I'm pretty sure she's the only one who can snap Shadow out of his sugar craze. Also we might be saving her life."

**(INTERUPTION **from The Author Laws of Changing History, book 13 out of twenty three:

_ Thou shalt not change history by saving people who are destined to die. Thou may borrow them from the past for a while, but in the end, thee must die._

"Yeah, but you're forgetting this is a CRACKFIC!" GhostKing shouted loudly.

_ Thee only exception is thee CrackFic of Doom_.

"That's better."**)**

"…What?"

"Yeah, long story…" GhostKing sighed. "But this way, she'll live!"

And by bringing Maria to the planet they screwed up Time.

** A BIT LATER**…

GhostKing and Silver returned to the planet with Maria.

"Whoa…you weren't kidding when you said you screwed up majorly." Maria observed the planet they were stuck on. "Can't you just teleport back?"

"Where's the fun in that?" GhostKing snickered evilly. "Come on, we tied Shadow to a tree so he wouldn't run people over."

As they approached the tree Blaze came running up to them. "Um…he chewed his way out of the ropes and is now somewhere." She said, ashamed.

"WHAAAT?" GhostKing paled.

That was about when a portal opened and Sonic jumped through.

"POKEMON GEEKS EVERYWHERE!" he screamed. "YOU GOTTA HELP ME!"

He burst out in tears and threw himself at GhostKing, crying, "I need a hug!"

Blaze, Maria and Silver took a few steps back. "Um..ok…" They muttered.

Mephiles walked over, giving GhostKing a weird look. "Care to explain that?"

"Not really, no." GhostKing growled, trying to push Sonic away, but he had an iron grip around her waist. "Let me go!"

Another portal opened, dumping a ton of tiny fish onto Mephiles' head. Sarah fell out and looked around angrily. "WHAT THE HECK?"

"What happened this time?" GhostKing asked.

"My fish died again." Sarah hissed, looking around at the tiny, dead fish. "They were cute too!"

She caught sight of Maria. "Oh, hi! GhostKing screwed up Time by bringing you here, didn't she?"

"Probably. This is the future, right?" Maria asked.

"The waaaay future." GhostKing slapped Sonic but he still didn't let her go.

"Well, I'll be back shortly. I have to get some non-dead fish." Sarah jumped through the portal again, leaving the dead fish.

"Well, that was weird." Mephiles said, kicking fish out of his way.

GhostKing flipped out and tried to kill Sonic with a hammer.

** XxXxXxXx**

"I knew something like this was going to happen." Blaze said later.

"What, Sarah falling through a portal with more fish?" Silver asked.

"No, Shadow would go nuts."

"You should have seen the way he was playing Guitar Hero, Maria!" Silver nearly fainted from the sheer memory. "It was soooo cool!"

Maria gave GhostKing a strange look.

"And to think this is all because of the fourth wall, probably." GhostKing muttered.

The tree that Shadow had been tied to uprooted itself and flipped over, and a secret path appeared with a giant neon sign that blared, GO THIS WAY.

Somewhere up on the ARK the lead scientist laughed to himself. He still had some control over the story.

"Weird…let's go!" Silver said.

So they went in the secret path that was bound to lead to danger, death, and doorknobs. Or anything else that begins with a 'd'. Donkeys. Doughnuts. Dill pickles. Ect.

It was kinda dark, but no one really cared. Blaze controlled fire so they had light and Silver glowed. Hurray.

Meanwhile Gerald was writing something about him writing something. A PARADOX!

"I had a thought." Mephiles said at last. "If there was a space that had all the spaces in the universe, would it still have its own space?" A CONFUSING QUESTION/PARADOX!

"Dude, don't make Sonic think. He might blow up." GhostKing warned.

Sonic blew up anyway, showering everyone in confetti and candy. SPUTNIK!

"OH BOY SUGAR!" A loud shout from the other end of the tunnel said.

Shadow came crashing into Silver, knocking him into next week via a portal. He grabbed candy and then ran off again.

"WAAAIT! Shadow!" GhostKing and Maria ran after him, screaming threats/bribes at him the entire way.

Silver came back because someone punched him into _last_ week. ANOTHER PARADOX THINGAMAJIG SORTA!

"Ow, my spleen!" he wailed.

They eventually caught up with Shadow, Maria and GhostKing.

"Did you catch him?" Mephiles asked.

"He had a sugar crash." Maria said. "Real shortly after he saw me."

"That's good, right?"

"Not really." Maria picked up Shadow and then started walking back the way she had come.

"Wait, hold on a second." Blaze said. "Let's go the way he came. Maybe we can find something/someone who can restore our lives to normal."

"That's a good idea." Silver said.

So everyone went the other way.

Along the way Mephiles sang 21 Guns by Greenday for no apparent reason.

A portal appeared in front of them, teleporting them all to the ARK.

"Hi, Grandfather!" Maria said. "We caught Shadow!"

"Oh, good." The professor said.

"Dude, stop writing the story for me! It's my job! I'm the Author, you're the scientist! Unless you want to make us a device thing to make everything the way it was…" GhostKing said.

"Sorry, I got bigger things to work on."

"Dang it!"

That was about when another portal opened and Midna and Black Doom came back.

"AW CRAP I THOUGHT WE GOT RID OF YOU!" Blaze sighed loudly.

"_No._" Black Doom said evilly.

"THIS IS NOT FRIED CHICKEN!" Midna roared.

Another portal opened and a whale came through, crushing Midna and Black Doom. Sarah slid down the whale's tail and stood there for a second, looking around. "This isn't SeaWorld…" She muttered.

"OH THANK GOD! We were about to be killed by some psychos!" Silver sighed.

The whale slammed him into the wall with its tail.

"Why can't I end up where I actually want to go?" Sarah wailed.

"Because it is not your destiny!" Mephiles said creepily.

Then Space imploded.

"NOT AGAIN!" Everyone yelled.

"GO AWAY!" GhostKing yelled back.

"Sorry." Everyone went away, looking rejected.

"Moron." Blaze hissed.

And that's that. GhostKing screwed up Time and Space. Also the world.

That was about when Shadow walked into the room.

"Wait a second…" Maria glanced from Shadow— who had just walked into the room—to Shadow, who was passed out in her arms.

"OH CRAP A PARADOX!" the conscious Shadow shouted, running in circles for a while before heading out the door, yelling about CrackFics.

"Man, he was doomed from the beginning." GhostKing sighed. "Breaking the fourth wall since he was created."

Then Sonic crawled out from the whale's mouth. "Miss me?"

"No." Mephiles lasered him and he exploded into candy again.

"I'm now really confused." Gerald said loudly.

"Me too." Practically everyone in the room said at the same time.

"This isn't good." Sarah sighed. "We need to set things straight."

"I can do that!" GhostKing opened a portal. "Everyone through!"

Everyone jumped through and GhostKing shut the portal, so Everyone could never return. No one liked that guy anyway.

"Now that we're done with that, let's work on getting home."

James T. Kirk materialized in the room with Samus Aron From the Metroid games.

"Since when have you two been together?" GhostKing asked awkwardly.

"Since never." Samus lasered Kirk and he exploded into kittens.

After that a random portal opened, and Erazor Djinn came, threatening to cut everyone's heads off. But the whale slammed him into the wall on top of Silver, and they exploded into rainbows.

"Why is everyone exploding?" Blaze demanded, exploding into banana pudding.

After that, everyone stopped exploding and Silver, Sonic and Blaze were back.

"Ok, I got a portal. Let's go." Sarah jumped through after pushing her whale through.

**XxXxXxXx**

GhostKing was writing a FanFiction about her writing a FanFiction. This time, it was actually legal and she created a paradox which saved everyone who embarked on that terrible journey. So everyone had a happy ending.

Wait…

Except Sonic. Mephiles blew him up into candy again. And then ate him.

And he didn't even share! The _nerve_ of that guy!

On account of GhostKing being annoyed, she revived Sonic and turned him into a werewolf. She then watched him and Mephiles battle it out. It was intense.

A portal opened and Sarah's voice came through:

"I FOUND SEAWORLD! HURRAY!"

"Good for you." GhostKing laughed.

Meanwhile, Ash Ketchum was plotting revenge on his runaway blue Pokémon…

** END FOR NOW**

** IT'S OVER, THANK GOD! **

** NO FLAMES.**

** HASTA LA VISTA, READERS!**

** Lordoftheghostking28**


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